Sunday, June 5, 2011

Are You a "Dancing with the Stars" Expert?

What will we do with our Monday and Tuesday nights now that “Dancing with the Stars has had its finale and the winners have been announced?   A dimpled MVP  wide receiver and a sixty one year old overweight and obviously out of shape  movie star have won  first and second place on dancing with the stars on the most watched series of Dancing with the Stars in its  twelve years.  If you are a "Dancing with the Stars" expert, read on!

Kim and Hines
Obviously ballroom dancing requires both athleticism and class and Hines is definitely a world class athlete and Kirstie has her own brand of class. And what a name for the sexiest dancer to strut his stuff since John Travolta, Maksim Chmerkovskiy!   But the real crux of the entertainment value of this competition is to take celebrities totally out of their element and put them into an unfamiliar one.  There are obstacles to surmount, fears to overcome, yes, fears, and also backgrounds to deal with.  Hines made a memorable comment, “from the ghetto to Broadway.”
So to fill the void left behind on Monday andTuesday evenings (and I am not normally a TV watcher,) I have derived a short list of my ten favorites to be on a future episode of dancing with the stars and the reasons why.

1. 1.  Betty White, why not prove that 88 can also be classy and sexy?
2. 2.  Sandra Bullock’s  ex-husband, Jesse James, a motor cycle customizer.  Should Maks be the only bad boy on dancing with the stars?  Perhaps it would solve Jesse’s  PR challenge since breaking Sandra’s heart.
3. 3.   Melissa McCarthy,  Mike and Molly Star, How about a real BBW who is also very funny and beautiful.
4. 4.  Joan Rivers, just because that would be a hoot and we could find out if she could end up saying, “Can we dance?”
5. 5.  Donald Trump, to discover how he would take being fired.
6. 6.  Hillary Clinton, wouldn’t it be great to see her in something other than a pantsuit?   She is still a pretty classy lady.
7. 7.  Illusionist, Chris Angel, would he dance or levitate?   He shouldn’t have any challenges with the aerials.
8. 8.  RuPaul, Andrew Charles--singer, songwriter, drag queen, why not dancer?  Judging from Maks’ comedic antics with Tom Bergeron, I think Maks should be his partner. 
9. 9.  Tom Jones, the world still loves to see him move his hips.
10 10.  Jaleel White, Steve Urkel in Family Matters (1990-1997).  It might be interesting to learn he is no longer the geek that we grew to know and love.

So who are your outrageous picks for dancing with the stars? 

Now because this is a Pittsburgh blog and because Hines Ward has just returned to Pittsburgh with the coveted Mirror Ball Trophy, what about your picks for Dancing with the Stars, Pittsburgh?

Here is the short list from me, Joanne Quinn-Smith, the TechnoGranny:
1.      Mr.  Mc Feely from Mr. Rogers Neighborhood—truly a legend and I’ll bet he still has a little twinkle in his toes.
2.      Former City Council President, Doug Shields, after all he used to be a clown before City Council among his other professions. Great councilman, funny guy!  Outstanding political moves! Could be something here!
3.      County Executive, Dan Onorato, he's going to be out of a job soon.
4.      Lynn Cullen, is her dancing as outrageous as her famous voice?
5.      Sally Wiggins, already in training from following Hines. She should have learned some moves by now.
6.      Assistant Chief of Police, Marita Bryant, she will keep law and order on the dance floor.
7.      Lynn Swan, the original dancing Steeler.  All those ballet lessons should come in handy; he just may have been Hines mentor.
8.      Darlene Harris, President Pittsburgh City Council, let's see if City Council would support her like the Steelers supported Hines.  Hint:  Holding your breath could be hazardous to your health.
9.      Rose from Quinn and Rose, she certainly has competitive expertise from the War Room.
10.  And finally the Pittsburgh Pirate Parrot has some nice moves, why not?  And no one would doubt that he would have animal magnetism on the dance floor.
Being a Fantasy Island fan from the seventies I am only sad that  Tattoo (played by Hervé Villechaizeis not around to say, “The BUS, boss, the BUS! as the star studded bus could ceremoniously arrive on Neville Island with Jerome Bettis to greet it and operate as master of ceremonies.
So waiting for your list and the winner with the best list will be interviewed on PositivelyPittsburghLive to give us your blow by blow analysis of Dancing with the Stars, what  your original predictions were and why you thought Hines was a shoo in to win the mirror ball.
Come on now, you know you want to do it.  Your turn to be a celebrity!

Here’s what we need:

1.      Name, address, phone number, e-mail address.  You know the drill.
2.      Your top ten picks for Pittsburghers to be on a special edition of Dancing with the Stars Pittsburgh and your reason for each one.
3.      You have carte blanche here to be funny and irreverent but not pornographic because PositivelyPittsburghLive is a g-rated show and we try to stay away from adult content.
4.      Please e-mail the PositivelyPittsburghLive staff at:

The top three list winners will be interviewed on a Special Edition of PositivelyPittsburghLive to answer the questions:  

Is there really Life After Dancing with the Stars?
Will the Mirror Ball Ever Replace the Super Bowl Trophy?
Should the Emmitt Smith/Heinz Ward Twinkle Toes Scholarship Fund be started for off season football players to take dancing lessons?
And any other tomfoolery or serious stuff that we can think up for the interview!
Actually after the winners are announced we will ask our readers and listeners to come up with questions.
Deadline for all applications is:  June 13, 2011.
PositivelyPittsburghLive Dancing with the Stars Special Edition will be talkcasted on the TalkShoe network on June 20, 2011 at 7 PM.
Joanne Quinn-Smith

2009 National SBA Journalist of the Year
AKA TechnoGranny, Talkcast Host

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